Don’t Make Me Kill You Pedro

I was in high school in 1973 when OPEC (the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries) caused a national crisis by embargoing oil, reducing the United State’s supply as punishment for US support of Israel during the Yom Kippur War. Within days there were long lines at the pump, gas was rationed, and everyone was freaking out. A few years later (1977), President Jimmy Carter gave a speech where he referred to the energy crisis as the “moral equivalent of war.” By 1977, however, the embargo was long over. Gas was again cheap and plentiful, so we all ignored him.

Fast forward to 2017.

When I was in Guatemala earlier this year, I saw a map showing the only places on earth where the coffee bush can grow. It didn’t include the US. The countries that grow coffee, all south of the border, have an organization similar to OPEC. It’s called the International Coffee Organization (ICO) and its member governments represent 98% of world coffee production.

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I wonder how our country would respond if ICO decided to punish the US for its policies by causing a coffee embargo? That’s right, no Folgers, no Chock Full O’ Nuts, no Cafe Bustelo (my poison of choice), and (OMG) no Starbucks!

I see long lines waiting for your rationed drop of lukewarm, brown swill made from leftover grinds, massive reductions in white collar productivity, withdrawal headaches, and widespread snarkiness. I see madness and mayhem. I see skies full of ICBMs, their red trails blazing arcs of fire toward those muthafucka’s who have our coffee. Take that Pedro!

I hope it never happens, but you border wall advocates better think twice before provoking the wrath of the ICO.

Unless, of course, you really like…Postum.

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Books by Brant

Newly Published!

For Christmas 2018, my brother, a pilot with American Airlines, gave me a gift that became the experience of a lifetime: 12 months of free travel anywhere American Airlines flies.

Thus began a year long journey that took me from the rocky coasts of Portugal, to the hot sands of Morocco, to the mangrove swamps of Panama, with many places beyond and between. In cheap hostels and the backwaters of the nomadic milieu, I discovered a treasure chest of colorful and fascinating people. I tell their stories and a bit of my own.

The trip became as much a spiritual and emotional journey inward as it was a literal outward one, and found me in a place those of you who are in the second half of life are likely to recognize.

With references to the philosophies of Carl Gustav Jung, Jesus, Bob Dylan, and the Buddha, Blue Skyways is an international romp by a man in his 60’s with not much more than a pack on his back, and still much to learn.

A suspense/thriller novel!

When a university student uses advanced software to analyze dreams from around the world, he discovers odd, unexplainable patterns in the data. Where one dream ends, another begins…even though the dreamers are strangers. Unique objects appear in one person’s dream and reappear in another's.

The patterns form a map pointing to an ancient, lost object, but when the student is mysteriously murdered, his deadbeat brother and estranged wife embark on an international race to recover the map's buried treasure. Along the way, the troubled couple are opposed by dark forces of the religious underworld, who launch a global pandemic to ensure the map's secret remains lost forever.

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